by Tim Wesemann
Oh give thanks to the LORD; call upon his name; make known his deeds among the peoples! (1 Chronicles 16:8 ESV).
Every day is a day of thanksgiving to the Lord for his faithfulness, grace, and salvation through Jesus. Since Thanksgiving Day will soon be here, I’m going to give thanks for the blessings of smiles, laughter, and joy. Satan revels in squashing those blessings in our lives. Pray to the Lord of joy and ask that he would fight that battle for you. Let’s spread some encouragement and smiles to those around us today!
Food for Thought
A Sunday school teacher was telling the story of Daniel in the lion’s den. She had a picture of Daniel standing, brave and confident, surrounded by lions. A little girl started to cry. The teacher said, “Oh, honey, are you afraid for Daniel?”
The little girl said, “No, it’s that little lion, over in the corner; he isn’t going to get any food.”
Signs from God? Well, Church Signs.
The following were spotted on outdoor church signs.
- Prayer: the best wireless connection.
- Looking for a lifeguard? Ours walks on water!
- When life gives you more than you can stand . . . kneel.
- Ready or not, here I come! - Jesus
- God, help me to be the person my dog thinks I am!
- Forbidden fruits create many jams.
- Whoever is praying for snow can stop now.
- We’re not an ice cream parlor, but we have great Sundays!
- The fact that there’s a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about anticipated travelers.
- Does life stink? We have a pew for you.
- With all this rain we need an ark! (Wait for it . . .) We Noah guy!
- Tweet others as you want others to tweet you.
- Exercise daily: Run from Satan. Walk with Jesus.
- Living without God is like trying to dribble a football.
Going the Extra Smile
- A road worker was arrested for stealing from the job site. His wife said, “I didn’t believe it at first, but when I got home, I saw the signs.”
- I asked my mechanic if new shock absorbers make a car easier to control. “Of course,” he said. “That goes without swaying!”
- One of the circus’s most well-loved clowns died. I wanted to apply for his position but I knew I’d have some big shoes to fill.
- Did you notice that debt collectors can’t let go of the past?
- Storm chasers are so fascinated by tornadoes, they tend to get carried away.
- I was quite upset when my car stalled and I was stranded on the side of the road. At least I had a shoulder to cry on.
- Chefs have the skillet takes to cook with any type of ingredient.
- My wife warned me not to pack the kitchen utensils. But it’s a whisk I’m willing to take.
- I was recently taken to court for my awful punning. The judge ruled, “You’re guilty but I’m giving you a suspended sentence. You may now . . .”
- The invention of the shovel was truly groundbreaking!
Fish and Chips
Lost on a rainy night, a nun stumbles across a monastery and requests shelter there. Fortunately, she had arrived around dinnertime and was treated to the best fish and chips she’d ever had. After dinner, she went into the kitchen to thank the chefs, where she met Brother Michael and Brother Charles.
“I’m very pleased to meet you,” she said. “I want to thank you for a wonderful dinner. The fish and chips were the best I’ve ever tasted. Out of curiosity, who cooked what?
Brother Charles replied, “I’m the fish friar.”
She then turned to the other brother and said, “Then you must be . . .”
“Yes, I’m afraid I’m the chip monk.”